top of page
No tags yet.

SEARCH BY TAGS: 

RECENT POSTS: 

FOLLOW ME:

  • Grey Facebook Icon
  • Grey Pinterest Icon
  • Grey Twitter Icon
  • Grey Instagram Icon

Modesty And What It Did To My Body Image


The idea of "modest" dressing has existed for as long as I know going to church. I remember going shopping and seeing that even as a short stack of pancakes, there didn't seem to be skirts that covered my knees. I still can't find what is so horrible about my knees that I would need to hide.

Growing up, I was sold by my spiritual leaders that I needed to dress "modestly", but I was never told why. The reasons were there despite being unspoken. If you dress in "revealing" clothing you'll get pregnant before marriage, you'll get raped, you'll make a man stumble by causing him to lust after you. Even though the first two are quite extreme, the most shocking one to me is the latter. How could I be guilty of the sin of another? The forcing of "modest" dressing started to cause me to stumble instead.

My body has always been about the same. Short and curvy. I love it now and I appreciate my body for so much more than what it looks like. The things I've been through. the pain I have felt and the places I've gone could not be possible without this incredible body I have been gifted. But when you're 12 and don't look like what you want, you take any excuse to cover up. That's what modesty was for me. It wasn't a way of protecting myself or my purity, but a way of giving myself the space to shame my own body.

My dressing was motivated by guilt. Guilt of looking the way I do. Guilt of feeling I could be the reason of someone else's failure. Guilt that God, of all people, could possibly be ashamed of me because of my clothes. I didn't look a certain way, so I didn't deserve to dress a certain way.

Now, the reason I put the word modesty between quotes up until this point is not because I believe modesty is a ridiculous idea, but because my idea of modesty was. See, I still believe in modest dressing. But it's different. I use modesty now to claim my body as my own, something I will only share should I choose to. I use modesty to worship God and show him I appreciate what he has given me. It's not about hemlines or spaghetti straps, it's about worship and comfort.

I don't need to wear long skirts and sleeves or stop wearing makeup and bright colors because someone told me to. Being unapolegetically myself with my style is my way of honoring God.

There also seems to be a double standard. Where at a church pool party, there are shirtless men, but women have to wear giant t-shirts and basketball shorts, it seems unfair. We've brought over the prejudice of the secular world into what is supposed to be a safe space, a space that celebrates freedom. These rules and limits are so far away from liberation; distracting from what is truly important in a relationship with God. I ended up replacing time of worship and connection with God to think about what I'm going to wear.

I recently read about the concept of Contextual Modesty. A modesty defined by where you're going and what you're comfortable in, not what somebody else is comfortable with you wearing. It's not about showing off your body or hiding it, it's about making your wardrobe a way of worship to the One who gave you that incredible, functioning body in the first place.

Now, let's establish the most important point of this article. Salvation comes through (and only through) the believing of the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ and the belief that he will return for his people. Not through actions, nor opinions, nor clothing. So, if you came here thinking I have the answer for Should Christians Wear Bikinis? I don't. I wish I could give you that answer, but I don't think God will make you turn around at the gates of heaven because your dress doesn't reach your knees.

Thanks for reading!

If you enjoyed this article, you might like Facing My Fashion Fears!

Like the Facebook Page! Ashion Fashion

Follow me on Instagram! @ashleyooacevedo

bottom of page